Building Better Relationships

We will now enter into the next step of the completion process, completion with others. Before entering into the completion with others, small story..

In Kailash, Sadashiva was living with his beautiful family, Devi Parvati, his consort, and elder son Ganesha, younger son Subramania. One day comes one great Rishi Narada and creates a mess, saying that I have a enlightenment mango. Anybody eats this mango will have enlightenment. The moment I heard about it, I wanted to give it to you Sadashiva because you are the greatest being on the planet Earth, so I wanted to gift this to you. Sadashiva said, “No, I already have enlightenment. I don’t want it. Maybe you give it to Devi.” Devi said, “No you already gave Me enlightenment, I don’t want this fruit. Maybe you can give it to our kids.” So the elder one and younger one, both of them started fighting. “I want... I want.” Then - quickly and comes back, They will have this fruit. Even in those days Subramania had his own private jet peacock. He just took his peacock and started. Ganesha is little heavy guy and his vehicle is also rat. How can rat drag the elephant? And even if it drags, how long? How can the speed pick up? So, Ganesha was looking around. Finally he got the click. He just went round Sadashiva and Devi three times and came and asked for the fruit. Sadashiva said, “How can you just go around us and then ask for the fruit?” Ganesha says beautifully, “He is going around His world. I went round My world.”

Understand younger brother is going around His world. I am going around, I went round my world. And he gets the fruit and rest is history.

Understand, We all may live, see, perceive somethings common, like this hall, all of us are seeing. But each one of us live in our own world. Please understand, we may see somethings as common in this world. That does not mean we are all living in the same world. The objects you may see, everyone of you may be seeing this objects, this mic. That does not mean we are all living in the same world, no. Each object, each person, each situation, all of us have our own perception. We all live in our own world. THE world is fact, MY world is perception.

Listen carefully, THE world is a fact, MY world is a perception. The actual happening, THE World, facts, your judgement, your labels, your ideas, your opinions, your notions, your interpretations, your beliefs, your experiences, your expectations, your memories, your explanations, your commentaries, your commentary on the commentaries, all this is your MY world.

How many of you understand this, THE world and MY world? One more example I can give. At the age of four or five in the school, teacher asks: “Who is the first prime minister of Bharat?” One kid just puts the hand up with all excitement, jumps on the chair and says Mahatma Gandhi. Actually Nehru, it’s not Gandhi. So wrong answer, teacher will shout: “Hey, Why did you give the wrong answer?” He will scream. That becomes a pattern in the child even after the age of fifty, even in their, in their team meeting, or the CEO meeting, he or she will not express her ideas. He or she will tell somebody. They will express and get the good name. He or she will never stand up again. How many of you have this kind of experiences? Because of something happened some time, still holding on to that. That impacts still the way you behave. If you see all the incompletions with others, your mother, father, brother, sister, every incompletion is just this “ The World and my world”. THE World is different. MY world is different. THE World is the World. MY world is hell. It’s your MY world: source of your hell and source of your self-torturing mechanism. _

So now, we will have a manana. Manana means contemplation. I want you to list all the relationships in your life. Start with your mother. That’s the first relationship. First list all the relationships: mother, father, brother, sister, whoever is part of your life, whoever was very strong, whoever were strong part of your life. Sometimes your school watchman would have been a strong part of your life because constantly he allows you when you come late to the school.

Actually in My school, watchman is only person I know. Nobody else is that close to Me because he is the only one who takes care whenever I go, he will allow Me and whenever I am not coming, he will come and search and bring Me to the school. In Bharatn villages if the kids don’t come to school, they will send the watchman to the house. The watchman will go and search. The, In whole Bharatn villages, you will have only five or six hideouts and the kids are not even intelligent to change the hideouts. They will be sitting in the same place ganging up, and he will come and beat all of us and take us to that school, and.. Somebody who was important part of your life, even if the person is not there, list it, list their names. You don’t have to list everyone. Whoever was important part, means whoever you remember with a strong connection, good or bad. Sometimes you’ll remember some teachers like a demon. Or you may remember some relationships like a devil, even good or bad, pen down. It can be even your pets, plants, trees, Guru, Gurus, God, Gods, sometime you develop certain kinds of a relationship with different Gods. Initially you are attracted to Hanuman and suddenly you think Hanuman is not listening to you anymore. Then go to Shirdi Sai Baba. After sometime you think Shirdi Sai Baba is also not listening to you and you catch Ganesha. People have some... Hinduism gives you the right to change your ishta devata. Actually it gives you the right to worship the way you want. This is exactly the word Sadashiva is uttering in Agama. He says, “I give the right to worship the way you want”. _

First list out all the relationship. Then, make a column. For example, your incompletions with your mother. Write the incompletion. Write THE world, actual incident happened, MY world, how you perceived. It’s like one example I can give. You are a child playing in the rain, jumping. Your mom comes and just drags you into the room and locks you and you hit the door, call all the bad words you know. Actual THE world is your mom, due to her concern about your health, afraid of you catching cold or fever, she is protecting you. That is THE World, actual incident. But your MY world is: Oh this demon cannot tolerate my happiness. If I am happy she can’t handle. She will do something. I don’t know where she learns all the torturing mechanism, whatever, whatever.

So your incompletions …THE World and MY world about your Mom, then about your dad, all the relationships you wrote. First list out the relationships, then make this column. Sit and just, I want you to spend little time on contemplating about each relationship. Please understand. When you have incompletion with a relationship, that is like a broken arm. Not only it is not useful for you, it is dangerous. Heal the harm. Not only it is not dangerous, you will have one more hand. To heal the relationship means you have one more hand.