“my first spiritual experience.”

my first spiritual experience. You call it satori or Samadhi. I want to share few things What happened after that experience… aftermath of first experience. Aftermath of Master’s experiences can be a very powerful technique. If you practice what happened in me after my first experience, you will experience the first experience. Understand: the expression which happened in me because of my first experience, if you start living them, you will experience the first experience. Let me narrate the aftermath of my first experience. First thing: I have become very rich in human qualities. I just sat and scanned exactly what all happened in me after my first experience. First thing I have to tell is that I have become very rich in my human qualities – love, caring, sharing, compassion, courage – all the human qualities - I have become very extraordinary richness. Please understand: as long as you remember you are just a human being, you cannot become rich in human qualities. You will always have the poverty in quality. The poverty in inner space. Only when you experience some other plane, a different plane, altogether, a different being, If you have disconnected from the human level and experience a superconsciouness, the birth… so then you carry a deep down anger towards your parents…Anybody who gives you a new breakthrough in your world…. Either giving physical body or spiritual evolution, you will have a deep anger towards them. Because they take you to a different plane. Understand: Your parents did…yes…in a way they are responsible for your sufferings in the birth, but , you should understand they are responsible for the great things that you enjoy in the human body. First thing: When you become rich in human qualities. When I became rich in human qualities, I was able to forgive deeply, including my present. I understood…when my parents gave birth, they brought little bit of suffering, this outer world suffering, but they gave me the possibility. They added so many things to me by giving this body. So deep forgiving… same way, with Master also. See Master, when he gives you a new consciousness, when he adds knowledge to you, spirituality to you, he takes you to the different plane. Sometimes there will be suffering. There will be that feeling: disconnection. So you start blaming the Master. Understand: he has taken you to the different plane. He has given you a different space. Remember, he has opened a new possibility. When a new possibility is opened, there will be one or two what you think as suffering. And beyond that, he has opened a new door. First thing: I was able to deeply forgive my parents for giving me the birth. We always carry a deep wound anybody who gives a new thing to us. Master – when he teaches new thing to you, for sometime you enjoy. Sometime you cherish. Sometime you see the positive things. Suddenly you start thinking you are not able to handle that new space. You are not able to handle that new opening. You are not able to live - that new consciousness. Then suddenly you see, you start developing little bit of hatred, feeling disconnection. All these things… understand: Master is not responsible for your sufferings. Your parents are not responsible The large way, if you see, you may remember, you may think, they are responsible. They are not. They only gave you the possibility. Its your choice, Same way, Master only gave you the possibility. Its your choice. He’s a possibility. By knowing that If you take your human body you may have to go through so many things… after that only you decide your parents. Your parents are like an instrument, a door… They are not responsible. Same way, Master is a door. He is not responsible. First thing: I was able to forgive my parents. Actually, the tremendous richness in the human qualities made me start loving everything. There was no suffering. There was no sadness. A deep joy. Deep ecstasy. All the human qualities have become very rich. If I have to say, aftermath of these few experiences, I was able to forgive my parents, I was able to forgive my teachers, I was able to forgive everything. I was able to deeply love everything. Understand: when you are in love, the whole Existence looks so beautiful. So great. And you feel everybody is playing their role. And whatever is happening, is wonderful. Great. Spiritual. I was not able to complain about anybody. I was not able to blame anybody. That was the one first thing, great thing happened in me. I was not able to blame anybody. I was not able to complain anybody. Suddenly you become rich. Understand: I always get complaints from people. And not only complaints, the people who complain, they constantly poke at the people who don’t complain. I tell them… and they tell them, tell the people who don’t complain… there’s a group which does not complain, which is just enjoying - and living, happily. And there is a group which continuously complains. The complaining group pokes at the other group which does not complain: oh! These guys are innocent. Ignorant. They don’t even realize. They are not complaining. Understand: the non-complaining group is a rich, intelligent, qualitative group. It’s rich in its human qualities. The non complaining group, if it is seen by the complaining group, some people in the complaining group think the non-complaining group is exploited. No. Nobody is exploited. When you are in love, when you are in the non-complaining group, suddenly you will see, everything is beautiful, you yearn for it. You yearn to be part of it, you want to enjoy it. If that love disappears, that richness the human quality, if it disappears, suddenly you see, everything has to be blamed. Everything needs to be abused. You abuse everything. You become life negative. You start creating negativity about the master. Not only the master with whom you live, you start creating negativity about all masters. And you start creating negativity about everything. You are not able to digest. You are not able to relate… the truth expressed. or the drama happening. As… new openings, new things. If you are ready to stand up, he helps you. He takes care. If you are unable to stand up, he waits he gives you your space. When people come and tell me, somebody left, I tell them, give them their space. Give them our love, care, compassion, if possible – spiritual energy, healing energy. And give them their space. Let every human being evolve n their own way. Let every human being live in their own way. I always feel a deep love deep compassion a deep healing energy for every living being, for every being. I can say, that’s one of the great achievement, that’s one of the great quality happened in me after the first experience. Able to forgive anybody. Able to forgive anything. And tremendous love. Tremendous compassion. Tremendous respect for every individual. The other say somebody came and asked me, ‘Swamiji, after spending two three years with you, why do people leave?’ How can they leave? Why don’t you keep them? Why don’t you keep them in the ashram or keep them with us?’ I tell them, ‘That is the greatness of a living master. He gives you. He never hypnotizes you. He never brainwashes you. He gives you all possibilities. You can leave even after ten years. Doors are open. A ordinary teacher will try to build things, teach things, create systems, and setups, in which you cant leave. But with Master, he gives you the possibility. All possibilities are open – to be in or to be out. Always, all possibilities are open, because the whole thing is built on love, freedom, and openness and compassion. When you are in love, you see this truth. The whole thing is built in love, freedom, compassion and truth. When the love disappears, suddenly you see, suddenly whole thing becomes dark. And you wont be able to relate what is going on – around the Master; what is happening around the master. The first richness happened in me is the tremendous love, unending love, the love which does not come down towards this whole Existence. The second thing: tremendous… I always tell them, I always tell people, When you practice the qualities of enlightened being, enlightened experience will happen in you. I am trying to exactly, consciously scan what are the other major transformation what all the other major other things happened in me, after the first experience. A deep respect for every individual’s freedom. Only when they come inside, when they want to be guided by me, I interfere. Otherwise, I keep my distance. I tell them, ‘no, no its ok. Wait.’ Even if they unconsciously doesn’t want to be guided, unconsciously try to tell, ‘please guide me’, because of the security which happens, or just to escape from their dilemma, I tell them, ‘no. wait. Let’s give some more time.’ See: when people come to me for guidance, they want to escape from their dilemma. They know, a powerful security is there, and the high intelligence is guiding. But sometime, their unconscious doesn’t want to be guided. Even if I make them wait, they feel that they are not guided, or if I guide them, again, they feel, that their freedom is lost. So when this kind of things happen, I tell them, ‘Wait. Slowly, slowly, whatever needs to evolve, it will evolve.’ This kind of people, when they leave also I tell them, ‘you have full freedom to come or leave. But never abuse what happened or the guidance which you received when you asked for guidance. You should not judge the incidents which happened when you are in deep love with the same, with the mind, which happens when that love is not there. When the love is there, what happened, what happens, you can’t judge the same incidents, same happenings, same truths, shared, same thing, when the love is not there. I tell people, I always tell people, when people touch my feet, when they are in deep love, that becomes a technique. When the love is not there, suddenly they feel, ‘oh, why should we touch his feet?’ They feel they have been exploited. I always tell them, ‘You are never exploited. When you touch with the deep love, you grow. Something happens in you. That joy, that love, that only makes you touch. That experience only makes you do that act. But when..suddenly… this is a … this is like a great truth: great experience… Understand: whenever child is given…CUT. So let coming out of the poison not be delayed. When you have a deep love, your actions are different. Your experiences are different. Btu when you come out on poison, when you are in depression, if you judge the same incidents, same actions, suddenly you start creating more suffering for you. and abuse others. Blame somebody else as responsible. When the deep quality of love, the richness the human qualities, when they become rich in you, suddenly you see – the truth, love, joy, ecstasy – behind the whole thing. I always tell people, live in that excitement, ecstasy, richness, and love. You will not be able to blame anybody. You will not be able to disrespect anybody. You will not be able to abuse the master. Suddenly you will see, the whole truth behind whatever happened or happening, or going to happen in your life.

First thing: I have become rich – in human qualities. When Annamalai Swamigal taught me… when I was learning from Annamalai Swamigal, when he was teaching to others, that life is beyond pain and suffering, I went and tested it on myself… and I cut my thighs, and I had bleeding, I had suffering. So naturally, I started abusing Annamalai Swamigal. I started blaming Annamalai Swamigal. But when I had my first experience, it was such a joy! I became so rich in human qualities, that abusing the Master disappeared in me. I understand… I understood he opened a new possibility for me. He opened a new possibility for me. It will become tremendous love and deep devotion for Annamalai Swamigal. I always tell people, to find out whether you are going in the right path, or in wrong path, only one quality: if you are in deep love with everything, if you are in a deep joy and ecstasy, if you are in deep gratitude towards the master, towards everything, then suddenly, you will see that ecstasy - showing everything as beautiful, everything as great thing, feeling connected. And you live the joy and ecstasy. I even felt when I had my first experience, how can I go back and see Annamalai Swamigal? Because I blamed him. Then… but the human qualities, the rich qualities, the joy and ecstasy, I was able to connect again. Live in ecstasy, share that with everybody. Understand: my message for the first experience day: many of you… I have given… I have opened a new possibility for all of you. Practically, I have given birth to you all. So all of you will have some suffering. Somewhere, consciously or unconsciously, you will be abusing me. You will be disrespecting. You will be suffering. Relax. Be rich in human qualities. Bring richness in human qualities. The aftermath of my first experience – whatever happened, love, devotion, the richness….love is more than enough. Suddenly you will see: you will be able to come to the third stage, third stage, of again feeling connected. Ultimate experience, the deep devotion, the deep ecstasy, you will come out of this unconscious sufferings, and again feel connected with the deep love, with the deep respect - how I felt connected to Annamalai Swamigal again, you will feel deeply connected again. You will be able to live and relive the joy and ecstasy. Again, feeling eternally connected and experiencing that richness in human quality. So all of you at some time or other, go through that second phase. Don’t bother, don’t worry, don’t be disturbed. Create a deep love. Create a deep joy, wherever you are. You may be near my form or away from my form. You may not be around my form. But I’ll be around your form. So, experience the third stage. Come to the third stage. Become rich human being. become rich in human qualities. Love, sensitivity, ecstasy, joy. Become rich in all human qualities. And come back. Experience the third stage. The ultimate eternal connection with the Master, which I myself experienced with Ananmalai Swamigal, which never left me after that; which never left me - after that. So let you all experience the eternal connection; eternal connection with the master. So today my message is: become rich in human qualities. My blessings is, again be connected eternally with the Master. Let you all achieve richness in human qualities and feel connected to the Master again. Because in my first experience, this is the same drama happened. First, I had connection with the master, initiation happened, then there was disconnection, little imbalanced, but I was continuously practicing… trying to practice those teachings and words. And the experience happened… suddenly when it opened up, and strong eternal connection happened. So I bless you all. Let you all practice the teachings. Even if you are not able to catch the Budha and Sangha, catch dhamma. Catch dhamma. The dhamma will lead you to such an intense, high experience. Suddenly you will see: the greatness of Buddha, and the beauty of his sangha. You will experience all the three. That is what I call: the eternal connection. I had this eternal connection after the first experience with Annamalai Swamigal. So, let you all even if you are away from Buddha, away from sangha, don’t be away from dhamma. Hold onto the dharma and you will see, the dharma suddenly explodes and creates an experience, with a deep spiritual truth. And that will awaken human qualities in you It will create a deep richness of human qualities in you. It will awaken the love It will awaken the joy. It will awaken the ecstasy. It will awaken the deep compassion, and you will again connect back to the Buddha and sangha through dharma. How it happened in me… I felt connected first to Buddha and dharma, not to sangha. Then, connection slowly disappeared from Buddha. But I held…. continuously I bowed. Let you all become rich in human qualities. I pray and bless. Let you all become rich in human qualities, and feel eternally connected to Buddha, dhamma, and sangha. Let you all achieve and radiate the eternal bliss, nithyananda.