“### From Lust to Love (kamathilirundhu kadavulukku) – Muladhara”

### From Lust to Love (kamathilirundhu kadavulukku) – Muladhara

This muladhara chakra is at the base of the spinal cord. Its very name ‘Muladhara’ means it is the basis for everything. Lust and imagination lock this chakra. When you drop imagination, it unlocks.

In Tantra, Lord Shiva has given us a meditation technique nearly 5000 years ago. What he has said at that time, biology agrees with today. In Tantra, it has been said that no human is fully man or fully woman. A man is 51% male and 49% female and a woman is 51% female and 49% male. If we can be born from only a man or from only a woman, we can be fully man or woman but it is not so. We are born from the muladhara chakras of a man and a woman. From this arises the concept of Ardhanareeshwarar (The Lord whose form is half man and half woman).

From the day we are born, we suppress all aspects of the lesser half in us. Society teaches us the qualities of the 51% part in us. Man is not meant to possess qualities of compassion, care and motherhood and similarly a woman is not meant to possess qualities like bravery and strength. What happens to this suppressed half in us?

What tantra said 5000 years back about man and woman, science has proved today with hormones. There is only a single hormone difference between man and woman.

A Man searches for this suppressed part outside of him because man came from fulfillment and his inherent nature is also attaining fulfillment. This search becomes lust towards women. Lord Shiva says, “The woman outside you does not disturb you. It is the woman inside that disturbs you.” All that is being said applies to both man and woman alike. At the age of 14, a boy starts collecting images of the women outside and when he is 21, these images take a proper shape and serve as a base for him to search for his wife. In olden days, these images were collected from primarily one’s parents. A boy naturally attracted towards the mother used to collect images from her and a girl naturally attracted towards the father used to collect images from him. A boy expects care from his wife like the care he received from his mother and likewise a girl from her husband.

Today, the scene is different. We collect images form media and build expectations on them. A lady brought her daughter to the ashram. The daughter was looking at a picture of Hrithik Roshan, a cinema actor. She told the mother, “Mom, when Grandpa dies, you somehow buy Hrithik and make him my grandfather, he is so good looking”. We collect features – eyes, nose, lips and what not from different images and make an image out of them and search for this image outside! One man asked me “Why has the concept of single man for single woman that was exhibited in Ramayana failed?” I told him jokingly “In the Ramayana, Seetha did not see Hrithik and Shah Rukh!”. Seetha was not under the load of any images. The only image she had was of Janaka her father and there was not much disparity between Janaka’s image and Rama’s image. Both were kings, both were skilled warriors etc. Rama settled comfortably in Janaka’s image for Seetha. Similarly, Rama had collected images from his mothers Kaikeyi and Kausalya. Seetha was not very different from these images. Imagination and reality were not a great mismatch for Rama and Seetha. When the gap between reality and imagination increases, the tension starts. When this gap is reduced, the tension reduces. When tension mounts the chain even breaks. Today, even as early as 7 years of age, the images start getting loaded. Advertisement hoardings, Television, Radio and other media know your weaknesses well. They touch these weak points and sell their products. There is rarely a hoarding without a female model. Take a toothpaste advertisement. Do men never brush their teeth? Take a car advertisement. 90% of drivers are men and yet the advertisement shows a female driver. Even a simple ‘Pure magic cookies’ advertisement shows only females. Media people are actually dream sellers. We collect all these images and try to consume them through dreams. Is it possible? Can your thirst for water be quenched by consuming salt? Your thirst will only increase! In this fashion we are buying and eating these images and the load on the muladhara chakra increases. At 21, we start searching to find reality that might match the image inside us. When we meet a person, we compare him or her with the image inside us and invariably find that there is no match. At some point in time, what we see outside seems like matching what is inside. What is inside is green and what is outside also appears to be green from the distance we are looking at. We spend ½ an hour everyday with the person and the green outside seems unchanged. We come closer by 10 feet and start spending more time and feel that it is not really green but actually yellowish green. We come still closer and feel that it is really yellow and progressively feel that it might be just cream. Finally we come together for 24 hours and realise that it is actually white. What is inside is green and what is outside is actually white. The Image inside and reality outside are different. The other person too has an image inside him or her, which he or her is trying to constantly find outside.

One 90-year old man used to sit every day in the beach from morning to evening watching the people in the beach. Another man who noticed this went to him and asked what the old man was actually doing sitting there. The old man replied that he was searching for a woman to be his wife. The man was shocked at this reply and asked him why he had never searched in his youth. The old man replied that he has been searching from when he was 30 years of age. The man was astonished and asked him what sort of a woman he was searching for and he replied “I am searching for a perfect woman. I found one woman who matched what I had in mind but it didn’t work out well with her.” The man asked why, for which the old man replied “Well, she was searching for a perfect man!”.

Now you know that what is inside is green and what is outside is white. Dreams can never become true because they are simply a dream. If they can become true, then they won’t be called dreams. Anyway, the honeymoon ends when you realize that the outside is white and not green.

One man got married. His friend presented him with a puppy dog as a gift for the wedding. Two months later the friend visited him and enquired about his married life. The man replied “When I got married, the pup used to bark and my wife used to fetch the newspaper, but now my wife barks and the pup fetches the newspaper. Just a small difference, that’s all.” The barking starts when you realize that the outside is white and not green.

In the west, when people realize that the outside is actually white, they simply leave it at that. In the East, it is then that the sculpting work starts; The training starts - man on woman and woman on man. Sculpting is good on wood to make furniture and on stones to make idols. What will happen when you sculpt humans? only flesh and blood will follow. That is why most of the homes today are not Dharmakshetras (abodes of Justice) but Kurukshetras (Abodes of war).

People say “I love my wife and that is why I am trying to change her.” Be very clear – you have a mould and you have a wife. If you really love your wife, you will change the mould to suit your wife, but if you love your mould then you will try to change your wife to fit the mould. Most of us love our moulds. This is the beginning of unrest in our homes. An intimate war begins.

In Tantra, Lord Shiva says, “When 2 people live together, there will be peace, when 3 people live together there will be a village-like atmosphere, when 4 people live together, there will be a city-like atmosphere.” What does this really mean? When the husband and wife drop their images inside them and live together, they are only 2 people co-existing and hence there will peace. When only one of them drops the image, there will be in effect 3 people co-existing and the atmosphere will still be relatively calm like in a village. When neither of them drops their image, there will be in effect 4 people trying to co-exist and the atmosphere become chaotic like in a city. Both the husband and the wife need to drop their images so that there are only 2 people in the house and not 4.

This chakra has a reserve of energy in itself. It is not like the other chakras where we have to create energy in them. With this chakra, we only need to cleanse the energy in it and take the energy upwards. If this chakra is in a healthy condition, clarity will set in automatically in you and good health will prevail. Chronic or fatal diseases like cancer, stroke etc. have their root in this chakra. If we understand this chakra completely we can maximise our Biological, Psychological and Spiritual energies. 80% of our problems lie in this chakra. When unmarried people train themselves to drop their imagination, they will be able to follow reality instead of following images. They will be able to analyze clearly, calmly and fully while selecting their life partner. Else, hormonal torture will make them select wrongly and they will struggle all through their lives. Unmarried people should try to keep this chakra clean to be able to bring in clarity while selecting your life partner. Married people should keep this chakra clean in order to fully welcome the partner into your lives by dropping your images. Lord Shiva says “A man can become Lord Shiva himself when he drops his images and a woman can become Goddess Parvathi (Lord Shiva’s consort) by dropping her images. One who is filled with love and thoughts of Lord Shiva lives in tapas (penance) and one who has burnt imagination becomes Shiva himself”. When you lose your imagination, you acquire the quality of looking at others’ lives and problems. Old people can easily drop their imagination and live a peaceful life without expectation. Not only between husband and wife, but also between siblings, expectations arise out of muladhara. Hormones control the mind. However much you try to control the mind, the hormones take it with them. A technique to keep our mind under control is given by Shiva in Tantra and is called Dukkaharana.

When we go for a round in the car and come home, we should be able to apply the brakes and stop the car. In this fashion, we should be able to apply brakes on our own minds as well. For most of us however, our minds are controlling us.

Dukkaharana the very name of this meditation technique is significant. Dukka means sorrow. Dukkaharana means to remove all sorrows from your life. Note that although this technique is to remove kama or lust, it is not named as kamaharana but as Dukkaharana.

Brahmacharyam (celibacy) is nothing to do with living in the outside world. It has nothing to do with being married or unmarried. It actually means throwing out the female that is inside you, that’s all. Once you have thrown out the female inside you, you can live with or without the female in the outside world. If you don’t throw out the female inside you, even if you get married, there will not be complete peace in your mind. Whereas, if you throw out the female inside you, whether you get married or not, thee will be peace in your mind.

Don’t give undue importance to the world outside; instead give all the importance to the world inside. If the muladhara gets disturbed due to psychological reasons, there are chances of children being born physically handicapped. In yester years, Rishis gave birth to children who were much more intelligent than the ones today. This is because the Rishis’ muladhara chakra was light and not loaded. The great sage Vasishta accepted his wife immediately because his muladhara chakra was clean and light. Our muladhara chakras are heavily loaded and therefore the child’s brain power is low. Purely by the Energy levels or Shakthi, there is a difference between the babies born then and now. If we watch the popular serial Chithi, we immediately want a Chithi like that in our lives. In the serial, they are simply acting and we start clinging on to the characters portrayed by them and start wanting that type of care and behavior from the people around us. What folly! Today, we are all buying dreams from dreams, not from reality. In yester years, people bought dreams from reality. If you truly got the mould in your mind from only your Mother, you will definitely accept your wife immediately. You have got the mould from television serials and other types of media and there starts the problem.

Pregnant women should practice meditation and spirituality. When children are born, we should be clear on what they wish to become and then dream on that, else they will be a projection of our own unfulfilled dreams. Most of us are actually wrongly placed in our lives; we are misplaced. There is complete confusion prevalent because of this. Doctors have landed up becoming Engineers and so on. The truth is, our mothers are trying to realize their unfulfilled dreams through us. The right way would be for the mothers to find out what their child wishes to become and then dream about it.

When a boy back answers, he becomes a man. When you try imposing your dreams on your children, they start back answering. You should kindle the intelligence in him for him to think, instead of asking them “Shouldn’t we advice you?” Dreaming in order to change ourselves is acceptable, but dreams to change others are not required. When Abdul Kalam says ‘Dream my children’, he is actually telling them to dream in order to sculpt themselves and not to sculpt others. One lady prays to God,” If my knees cease to ache, I will shave my husband’s head as an offering!”

There are two kinds of imagination namely psychological imagination and chronological imagination. Chronological imagination is a plan for you to change yourself. For eg., you might tell yourself “When I reach home, I will do this first and then this”. This imagination is alright.

As you meditate, imagination decreases and as imagination decreases, meditation increases; this is a cycle. Imagination in order to change yourself is a plan while imagination to change others is simply imagination.

What is rotating in one direction now needs to be stopped momentarily and made to rotate in the opposite direction. To stop it and make it rotate in the opposite direction, one needs a Master. We are all traveling fast in a car without brakes. Why did Ashoka grow trees on the road? To stop these cars! The tree that is the neem tree is the Gnyani (Master). He stops the racing in you.

You should not allow even a single nerve in your body to sleep. Tantra shastra says that out of the thousands nerves in our body, only 14,000 nerves function. The remaining nerves go on long leave and retire from there; retirement without coming to the job! We need to awaken these nerves. This meditation technique does this job of awakening. It increases the sensitivity or love in you.